Pain and Laughter

August 20, 2008

Today was a very painful day.

I allowed myself to really feel some of Mariah’s suffering to the best of my ability and admit that a few times I almost questioned whether or not I was fit to handle the experience. Although Mariah has grown to be able to communicate somewhat verbally and has gained lots of strength and technical ability and dexterity, she has asked me several times to take away her pain.

She is struggling to accept her helplessness and her dependency and mostly she has spoken to me of being extremely sad. Today she said, “Please wake me up”. When I asked her what part of her was asleep she responded, “All of me”. It is as if she is in a nightmare or desperately hoping that she is.

I would ask that everyone pray extra heavy upon reading this blog for Mariah to gain some acceptance. Pray for acceptance and willingness for Mariah, if that is God’s will. I sure hope it’s His will, for I believe strongly she could use both.

I am happy to report that there is laughter and smiles amidst this misery. They occur a bit less frequently these days, but it helps remind me that miracles are alive all around us every day. Some days we just have to search harder…

Love and Light,
Clay

3 Responses to “Pain and Laughter”

  1. Jennifer Brennan said

    Dear Mariah,

    I met you while you were the sub for Dana at the Greenbelt bootcamp. I was the very pregnant one. One of the character traits I especially appreciated about you was that you offered encouragement to keep exercising and you believed in me when others doubted me. This is a very difficult personal challenge for you, I know. But, you CAN do this. Just as you inspire others, I hope that all of us can inspire you and provide hope to you on the days when you find it difficult to rally yourself.

    Best Wishes,

    Jennifer

  2. Leah said

    I know patience is one of the hardest things in the world to need but please be patient Mariah.

  3. jean Jones said

    DearMariah, We are all so proud of the efforts you are making and can’t imagine how difficult it is, but you are making progress. Keep it up.We are “holding you in the light.”

    Mariah, I am a Friend friend who has known and loved
    your family for many years. Your mother is one of my best friends and I feel close to you through her.

    All good wishes.
    In health,
    Jean Jones

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